You cant jump across a river in two jumps

Bob Hope, Phyllis Diller, George Burns and Woody Allen are collectively considered the masters of the one-liner. But, as any parents with an autistic child will tell you, the aforementioned celebs are mere minnows next to our one-liner titans. Autism has blessed our little hooligans with an innate ability to cut through all the political correctness and hit the nail on the head with a very large and blunt hammer. No title, social standing or class escapes the direct approach employed by “Auties".

The current collection of politicians in South Africa is enough to elicit laughter on its own, yet Cody still has a go at them every now and again. This morning while we were watching the news he asked, “Why is Jacob Zuma(President of S.A.) always on TV? He should be working. He’s not an actor, is he Daddy?” I couldn’t say anything. The Poms don’t elude Codys scathing political analysis either. During the recent British elections, David Cameron (Current British P.M.) was standing at a raised lectern speaking to a group of factory workers, when Cody turned and asked, “Why is he so high above the people, it makes him shout at them.” Once again I had nothing to say. He also once asked if Australians lived on an Island because nobody else liked them. This time I had heaps to say.

Cody is an equal opportunity humorist and wouldn’t dream of leaving anyone out in the cold, so in that vain he recently asked me, rather loudly, why a very overweight guy at the supermarket was so fat. The guy heard Codys remark and smiled and said to Cody, “God thought I was so special, he made a lot of me.” To witch Cody instantly responded, “I don’t ever want to be that special dad.” I looked up at the chap, preparing my apology, when, to my relief, he burst out laughing and gave Cody a hug. I often find political correctness gets in the way of people really talking. Cody, without the social inhibitions that the rest of us have drummed into us from an early age, can chat to anyone without judging them, while we would rather avoid anyone who is different and without even talking to them, judge them from a distance. Cody, a few months ago, asked a guy in a wheel chair why he had no legs. The man told Cody he had lost them in an accident. At this response Cody laughed out loud and long. The other people around us glared at me shook their heads and some even mumbled that I should give Cody a good hiding. I could see them wondering how we could be so insensitive. Cody eventually stopped laughing and said to the guy in the chair, “You cant loose your legs silly, they are stuck onto your bum.” After the guy in the wheel chair stopped laughing he said to Codes, “You know, you are very right. I didn’t loose them, they were taken off because they were very sick and if they didn’t take them off I would have died.” We said our goodbyes and as I turned to take Codys hand, Geoff(that’s the guy in the chairs name) tapped my leg and said to me,” You know I thought I’d lost them all this time and people tend to miss things they’ve lost more than the things they have given away.

Although anyone can be the target of Codys unconventional wisdom, Nina and I are the prime targets on a daily basis. “I want parents, not a couple of pirates”, “Come here you old witch”, “Stop singing dad, its awful.” are just a few of his recent offerings. My all time favorite is, “You can’t jump across a river in two jumps.”